SCENE FOR HISHE - 1º IDEA FULL

1º IDEA  - SCENE FOR HISHE - (Warning: English is not my first language)

Scene description: Deadpool is lying on the barrels holding a cigarette, ready to make himself explode because his girlfriend has died.

Voice 1- Oh, please, Deadpool, you break the fourth wall so many times and know so much about pop culture and you didn't expect something as predictable as your girl getting killed?
Voice 2- Yeah, she barely appeared in the trailer. And it was obvious that her only role in the movie would be dying or, at the very least, breaking up with you, so you had to go through some drama, wishes for revenge and make you feel down so you would put all your pieces back together again. Machete 2, The Bourne Supremacy, Kick Ass 2, Robocop 3... It's a quite common cliché.
Voice 1- Do you know what would be another cliché? If she had died while pregnant. But she died only after she had her IUD removed, so... You still didn't avoid the cliché. Shame!
Voice 2- Oh, God, Voice 1! I already told you, you bet she would die pregnant, I'm not going to give you back your 20 bucks.
Voice 1- Oh, man! Fuck! I was so sure... Do you know why I knew that Cersei was pregnant before she confessed it? Because we all know Jaime will kill her, and if she is pregnant with his child that will create some drama.
Deadpool- What the hell is going on? Who are you two?
Voice 1- We are voices in your head.
Voice 2- Yeah, it occured to us that the death of your wife was the perfect occasion for you to have the only feature from the comic character you are missing: schizophrenia, having several voices inside your head and interacting with them.
Deadpool- Nah, that's not happening.
Voice 1- Why not?? The character will be even better.
Voice 2- And think about the amount of jokes people could make about it.
Deadpool- That's the thing, writers won't come up with any jokes about that.
...
Voice 1- Not even one?
Deadpool- Not even one.
Voice 2- Are you serious?
Deadpool- Yep.
Voice 1- They brag about the inclusion of the LGTBI+ community in the movie, but you don't have the balls to show people with mental disorders!
Voice 2- Or jokes about Muhammad .
Deadpool- Okay, it's over! It's decided. You are out of this movie, get the fuck out of here.